Grew up on the verge of extinction underneath a lonely pile of beans left on the back of a bus one lazy summer afternoon. Went on to become a nonprofessional bystander at the age of 4, and full fledged brown nose by the age of 10, showing signs of a bright future in general psychological disorientation and delusions of grandeur. His extrovert personality and charisma inevitably saw him into a prestigious position of self importance within the music industry. Later in his career, during a drug induced mid life crisis he took up badminton. However, it was not his love of shuttlecocks but his love of arrogant, pretentious cocks that drew him back into the music scene where he would make his mark by pioneering a revolutionary fusion of overconfidence and poor taste. After being under a number of successful trousers he coproduced the largely bipolitical, autobiographical and hypercritical masterpieces "Waiting for the Petrol to Run Out" and "Arranging Deck Chairs on the Titanic".
